'Short funny quotes to have the dose of fun and laughter with everyone around you.'
"Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly."
~Mae West
"If you try and don’t succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie."
~Anonymous
"When women go wrong, men go right after them."
~Mae West
"A man's only as old as the woman he feels."
~Groucho Marx
"The best way to behave is to misbehave."
~Mae West
"If it sells, it's art."
~Frank Lloyd
"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint."
~Mark Twain
"Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else."
~Will Rogers
"Act like a horse. Be dumb. Just run."
~Jumbo Elliott
"By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."
"Dancing: the vertical expression of a horizontal desire."
~George Bernard Shaw
"Life is Tough, get a helmet!"
~Anonymous
"Eternity is really long, especially near the end."
~Woody Allen
"Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere."
~Mae West
"A woman drove me to drink, and I never even had the courtesy to thank her."
~W.C. Fields
"I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me."
~Winston Churchill
"One has fear in front of a goat, in back of a mule, and on every side of a fool"
~Edgar Watson Howe
"I was married by a judge - I should have asked for a jury."
~George Burns
"Some drink deeply from the river of knowledge. Others only gargle."
~Woody Allen
"The report of my death was an exaggeration."
~Mark Twain
"I can resist everything except temptation."
~Oscar Wilde.
"Marriage is like jogging through a puddle of industrial strength rubber glue."
~Anonymous
"Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~Benjamin Franklin
"Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand."
~Anonymous
"There is only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it."
~Anonymous
"A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths."
~Steven Wright.
"Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits."
~Mark Twain
"A good essay is 10% inspiration, 15% perspiration, and 75% desperation"
~Anonymous
Thousands of Short Quotes on every turn of Life. These quotes gonna inspire you, let you understand the ups and downs of life, will teach you how to overcome and you will feel more confident and motivated.
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